Don’t go in the water James’ mouth.

James is a teething boy and he’s not afraid to let you know, by way of a swift and deadly chomp. OK, it’s not deadly, but sometimes the pain inflicted by his cute little teeth is such that one might, for a brief and fleeting moment, wish for death.

James’ first two teeth have been drilling their way through his glistening gums for nearly a month now, and while I expected he’d get some top teeth shortly, I didn’t expect one quite so soon — especially the one we got.

James had been cranky and poopy to such an extent that his caretaker at the gym was worried he was sick yesterday. The only giveaway that our wee boy was teething lay in his suspiciously luscious apple cheeks and the bounty of drool gushing forth onto his shirt, his bib and countless unsuspecting victims.

And today, while he was having a little scream, I took a look at his upper gums and sure enough, there was the tiniest razor-sharp ridge poking through like the first bud of spring. But it wasn’t the first incisor, as one would expect. Rather, it appears James will be getting his second incisors first, which will likely leave a bit of a gaptoothed smile reminiscent of a first-grader until his first incisors come in.

Also sticking around for a while, we suspect, will be his new biting habit. While I am his usual victim, he has been known to suck on his hand, accidentally snap his deadly jaws down upon it, and then scream himself silly. It would be cute if it weren’t so sad!

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